Exclusive pumping: How do you know when it’s time to quit?

[Exclusive pumpers, this is for you.] You’ve heard the phrase “Never quit on a bad day” but how do you know when it’s a “good” day to quit? It can be a really hard decision, and sometimes you’re not even in control of the decision in the first place! (Totally unfair, I know!)

I asked the mommas over on Instagram and compiled a list of reasons mommas end their pumping journey. If you are trying to decide when to call it quits, hopefully this list helps! (And if you’re not the one in control of your journey ending, hopefully this list helps you feel a little less alone.)

Your priorities change

It’s okay if your priorities change. If sleep deprivation is making you crazy, maybe it’s time to prioritize sleep (and that’s okay!) If you are missing out on time with your baby or older children, maybe it’s time to prioritize time with them instead of time spend pumping (and that’s okay!) It’s a good idea to honestly review your priorities every now and then and see if exclusively pumping can still top the list. Need permission? Here’s permission. It’s okay if pumping cannot be a priority in your life right now.

Your mental health is suffering

Something I repeat often is: “Any amount of breastmilk you can give your baby is beneficial UNLESS your mental health is at stake.” I am a huge proponent of supporting maternal mental health through therapy and medication. I love how both are being normalized in social media and daily conversations I’ve heard between new moms. Your mental health is incredibly important. If exclusively pumping is damaging to your wellbeing, please prioritize your mental health. Your baby needs a happy, healthy momma.

Your body tells you it’s time

Hormones are powerful. They are the reason you lactate in the first place. They can giveth and they can taketh away! Some mommas reported a drastic reduction in supply that came with the return of their period or a new pregnancy that made them quit pumping altogether. Other mommas reported bad cases of mastitis or recurrent clogged ducts that greatly reduced their milk supply and caused them to end their pumping journey prematurely.

You can’t make it work with work

Keep in mind that here in the U.S. employers need to give you time and space to pump for up to one year. (Read more about your legal rights to pump here) However, some jobs are harder to work a pumping schedule into, right? It sucks, but it’s true. You might have “space” to pump, but are disgusted by the supply closet they make you pump in. You might have “time” to pump, but the pumping room is in a different floor of the hospital you work in, and you can’t make it work with your schedule. You might be facing pressure from your boss (They should really go read this book by Sarah Wells, by the way.) or pressure from your coworkers. For that, I am sorry. Sometimes people can really lack empathy for new mommas, and that sucks. It’s definitely a reason mommas quit pumping, and I wish it weren’t.

You met your breastfeeding goal

[Reminder: Pumping IS breastfeeding] Setting a breastfeeding goal can help you know when to end your journey. I always suggest setting a manageable goal (which looks different for everyone) and reassessing when you hit that goal. You might hit your goal of pumping for 3 months, celebrate, and box up that breast pump. You might hit your goal of 6 months and feel that you’ve found ways to make pumping more sustainable, so you set a new goal of 9 months! Either way, setting and reaching a benchmark goal can help you feel like you’ve accomplished something- because you have! Celebrate yourself and your achievements, momma!

You have enough milk in your freezer

Some mommas have enough of an oversupply to create a freezer stash of milk. Mommas use an app like PumpLog to calculate how long their freezer stash will last, and quit when they have enough milk. Read this before starting a freezer stash!

Maybe you just… know.

For some mommas, it’s not about a schedule, goal, or external factors. Maybe you just feel, in your gut/soul that it’s time. Some people meditate about it, some pray about it… either way, some mommas simply feel like a peace has fallen upon them, letting them know it’s okay to quit.

*Important note*

Ending your pumping journey is YOUR decision, NOT someone else’s. Be clear and honest about your goals with your family, friends, and doctor. If your spouse gets whiney and tells you it’s time to quit, it is NOT their decision. If your mother-in-law doesn’t understand your determination to exclusively pump, it is NOT her decision. If your pediatrician tells you that your baby is 1 year old and can switch to a different kind of milk, but you still want to pump past age 1, it is NOT their decision. If your employer won’t give you time to pump past age 1, then yes, they can legally stop you from taking as many pumping breaks, BUT you can still pump at lunch, on any other shorter breaks, if possible, and before/after work. I’ve seen it work. Your milk supply may decrease at that point, but it’s still YOUR decision.

What if you still want to make it work, for now?

Okay, you read through this whole list and you STILL want to make it work, for now at least. I support you! Consider making an appointment with me to talk through the roadblocks you are facing. Consider downloading my Pumping Sucks guide and troubleshooting some things that make pumping suck.

When your pumping journey does draw to a close:

• Wean safely from the pump (See: How to Wean from the Pump)
• Process the emotional rollercoaster of weaning (This blog post may help!)
• Have GRACE with yourself, and gratitude for your body!
• Honor your journey.